Crosswalk 2011

This morning we (the mentoring team) dropped off 10 groups of students in the middle of nowhere Minnesota on their Crosswalks. Here is the team I dropped off 2 hours from campus, near Murdock, MN--117 miles from BCOM. (If they look happy it's because they didn't have a clue what their surroundings looked like yet!) Their task is to return to campus relying solely on the Lord's provision. They have nothing but Bibles, journals, a cross, and water bottles, and cannot ask for money, directions, rides, or food. It's awesome to watch the Lord provide--I know, because a year ago I was doing a crosswalk on this very weekend! It's challenging, but faith building, and the end results are incredible.

Look Up

Have you ever noticed that the darker it is, the better you can see the stars? Can you imagine what the stars looked like in the wilderness?

The Israelites wandered in the desert wilderness for forty years--led by the Lord, but neglecting Him. They swayed between worshiping the Almighty God with reverential awe, to cursing His name and pursuing idols--like a perverted waltz between two lovers... or three... or four. How many lovers did they turn to during those forty years? The Lord was undoubtedly with them, His presence visible through a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night. In Numbers 14 we are told that God was seen "face to face".

Sometimes the Lord leads us into the wilderness for a season. It is dry, we complain, and yet the Lord faithfully makes His presence known to us--perhaps not through pillars of cloud and fire, but through the daily undeniable endowments of His love. Is the arm of the Lord too short to provide for us beautiful gifts, even in the desert? If only we would be wise enough and trust Him enough to look up and see them! Think about how incredible the stars would be in the wilderness; only in the deep, deep darkness would they be so luminous.

Next time you find yourself walking through the desert, make sure you look up. You wouldn't want to miss one of God's glorious gifts that He bestows on those He loves. And you know that He loves you. Even under affliction, even in pain, even when joy is hard to come by, He is still thinking of the ways that He can remind you of His irrevocable adoration for you, His child. Look up.

Oh Unbroken Heart

Last week I had to write a poem on the judgment of God for class. I shared it with a friend and he said I should share it with others.... so here goes. :)

Oh Unbroken Heart

Oh unbroken heart,

Such deep walls of callousness

Standing against Almighty

You think you will win?

Placing yourself above the rest

Willing that you should prove

Preeminent

But this is proof of your own

Damnation

Do you not know His nature?

Oh unbroken heart,

He requires your death

Truth, love, righteousness

Cannot dwell with

Revulsion, conceit, impurity

Why not turn and find life?

Oh unbroken heart,

You choose your own destiny

Your eyes reveal

Bitterness, anger, betrayal

Against the One who has shown

Patience, tolerance, kindness

Do you think He will overlook you?

Oh unbroken heart,

Your deeds declare you damned

For He cannot go against Himself

If only you would seek His face

You would find His mercy

To be yours

Oh unbroken heart,

Cry out, let your guard down

Be broken and find yourself

Made whole

Blunder.

blunder.

My defenses fly;

all the truths I knew

and denied

thrown up into my face.

I really am that person—

but I’m not.

My past eradicated

a new life claimed

so why continue with the old?

What now?

Perseverance

needed.

Apathy

wanted.

I forfeit my right

to a perfect façade.

This is the starting point

for something better.

Though I Would Like to Complain....

I am sitting here on a dreary Sunday afternoon with a long list of things to accomplish before the day's end, and I am writing thank you notes to my faithful supporters who have donated to my Global Internship. Because of the long list that still awaits me after these notes are written and safely in the mail, I am tempted to complain that I need to write these cards at all... The stress of the coming weeks is already building and I want nothing more than to relieve all unnecessary pressure and do what I really need to do.

That is my flesh talking.

But really, though my flesh wants to complain right now, I can do nothing more than smile out of the deep appreciation in my heart that the Lord is stirring people's hearts to give to me, to join me in ministry, to bring His Gospel where He has not been named before. Who am I that God would entrust me with such a commission, and bring people alongside me, trusting the Lord to use me? I am humbled, and blessed, and so, so grateful.

Thank you, all, who have given... Thank you for listening to the Spirit's quiet voice and responding in faithfulness to Him. May He bless you generously all the days of your life!

Rejoicing always, and smiling in thankfulness for you,

Jules

Running Water

Finally, I can hear running water. That only means one thing: spring.

It seems like it has been years since I smelled the rain and felt the sun, picked flowers and walked with soft grass beneath my feet. I know spring in all its fullness is still a ways off, but at least the signs are becoming more frequent. I can't wait for the day when I can cut through the courtyard of campus again--without snow boots on. I can't wait till I can sit outside and read, listening to the birds singing their love songs and feeling the warm breeze on my skin. Already I've started wearing my spring clothes--beckoning it to come faster--as if I had some say in the change of seasons.

I'm ready for spring in my heart to come too. The winter has been long, and the wilderness has been rough on my heart. I need light, I need a new view, I need more Son! God, in His gentle way has spoken to me that He has me in the wilderness to learn how to sing and hope in the valley (Hosea 2:14-15), not only when He has brought me into a peaceful place. It is a difficult lesson, but one I am willing to learn if it means new growth in my heart. He is pruning away everything that is not of Him (Jeremiah 5:10) in order to bring new life. I am eager for that new life, because I need some growth in my life. How good He is to never be content with our unholy state--but to do whatever is necessary to make us perfect.

I am looking forward to the day when I hear water running through the desert.

Until then, I will keep rejoicing.

Jules

Spring Break 2011

Hey friends, I thought I would tell you about my spring break my documenting it through photos--cuz I thought you might appreciate seeing nine photos instead of reading 9,000 words! ;) So here goes....

Friday afternoon found me free and eager to play--party time!

Dinner with some friends @ Applebees after a fun day of kickball and... shopping at Walmart :)

My friends Katie (pictured above in a Mexican candy shop), Vic, and Matt explored the Global Market in downtown Minneapolis on Sunday afternoon

Monday morning--kinda freakin' out!

Me and Halle @ the Life Center on Tuesday night!!

Wednesday afternoon found me doing homework for about 7 hours. See that book I'm reading? 224 pages conquered in one afternoon. Holla back.

I decided to have some fun on Thursday to make up for the studying I did the day before. Not only did I go ice skating--I also went sledding! woohoo!

My broski Jay and I went shopping on Friday afternoon @ at MOA. Lots of fun :D

Soooo.... I got a little adventurous toward the end of break and here's what happened--a new haircut! How do you like my new look??

Hope you all enjoyed my spring break! Haha. It was blessed and relaxing--not quite as productive as I had hoped.... but sometimes you just gotta let yourself have a little fun. :) Those five page papers can wait a couple weeks....

Rejoicing... because I'm loved,

Jules