Heartbreak has not been a stranger to me all my life. I have
known heartbreak on several occasions since I was a young girl…. I remember
lying in bed at night, listening to parents and siblings fight and thinking, this is the worst night of my life. Of
course, worse nights came for me. As I got older I struggled for myself in my
relationship with my parents, and many nights cried long and hard over the pain
in my heart after arguments. Later, most of the heartbreaks I encountered were
self-inflicted. I pursued things and people that I knew were not good for me; when
they were finally ripped out of my life, I experienced the pain of having given
so much of my heart to something that when it was gone, I felt as if my heart
were literally torn in two. Boys. Parents. Friends. All have left me
heartbroken at various times. I have shed many tears over my personal pain.
One day, perhaps a year or two ago, I asked the Lord to
allow me to feel heartbroken for someone else. For so long I had known only
hurt for myself; I had cried over my own heartbreak countless times. I wanted
to feel pain on behalf of another person.
The Lord answers prayer.
I am heartbroken.
I am heartbroken for three little boys who have a mother who
does not love them enough to care for them herself, and so are passed around
from person to person who cannot commit to raising them. I am heartbroken for a
girl who has left a life of working in the bars, but is struggling to stay out
of it—wanting love and looking for it in men and sex. I am heartbroken for a
girl who allows money to define her, and refuses to give up a job she despises
just so she can live in financial security. I am heartbroken for men who are
looking for fulfillment in their lives by buying cheap sex, and are so casually
willing to destroy the lives of others in the process. I am heartbroken for a
girl who desires freedom to do what she wants in life, but doesn’t realize that
true freedom is found in Christ.
Today I cannot stop weeping. I am so heartbroken. I am not shedding a tear over any pain of my own—I
am crying over the pain of so many who simply need Jesus.
“The Lord is near the brokenhearted…” Psalm 34:18
God, be near them,
because though they may not realize it, their hearts are breaking, and they can
only find healing and freedom in You.
Thank you, Julie, for being Jesus's tender heart toward these and I am sure so many others. Your tears are not in vain. God sees them, and loves the fact of what breaks HIS heart is breaking yours, Blessings to you, and do take a nap, a walk, a break, especially if you have a sweet friend to do it with - I have been carried through some really hard things through the caring of friends who God has used to comfort and encourage me. Praying for you, sweetestjules!
ReplyDeleteJan Gidel
Thank you SO very much for these encouraging words. I am being carried by the prayers of many right now, and I feel it. Couldn't do it without the Body! Thank you!!
DeleteI've been there. You have been blessed to experience the heart of the Father for us and His pain caused by our sin which separated us from Him. You have experienced the heart of the Son, loving and facing rejection at the same time. And you know the heart of the Spirit, who longs to fill and change those in bondage. But since this is a supernatural experience, trust Him for the grace to persevere and hope. Look deep into His heart and you will be filled.
ReplyDeleteMiss ya Jules!
Steve